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The land that style forgot

If you want to witness the entire combined collections of Accessorize, Monsoon and Coast being modelled by ladies in alarming shades of fuschia, you need look no further than Ascot. Fascinators and 'interesting' head pieces were of course de rigeur, with a couple of publicity hungry creative gals wearing hats in the shape of Big Ben, and erm, Edam cheese.

On the celeb front, Simon Cowell attended, holding court amongst his bevy of ex-girlfriends, and wearing morning suit teamed with aviator shades and iconic buzz cut. Poor Roxanne Pallett from Emmerdale was turned away for wearing a mini dress, but later reappeared, having made a mercy dash to Debenhams in Slough.

As usual, though, it was Joan Collins who stole the show, in a Lady Gaga-esque creation (well, if Gaga was an octagenarian), sporting mammoth shoulder pads. Long may she reign!

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